Wednesday 25 April 2012

Moving Home

Hey guys,  I'm moving.  Moving blog that is. 

For 3 years, this has been home to my ramblings about losing weight, and I think I've sort of outgrown it a bit.  It's much more than the weight now.

At the same time, I recently found out that this blog has been found by a few people in my "real" life.  I don't think I realised how much I valued my semi-anonimity until I lost it (sorry guys in real life). 

I don't want to give up blogging though, as I value the outlet for my thoughts and somewhere to write down all my stuff and my perspectives on it (and sometimes hear yours), so I'm moving to a new home. 

If you're desperate to follow me, maybe shoot me an email and I'll see what I can do ;o)

Otherwise - happy adventures everyone!

Time to stop losing and start living.

Wednesday 18 April 2012

Dinner Party Disaster Avoidance

I'm feeling at least a little proud of myself today, as I managed to maintain a small amount of discipline last night at the dinner party, and so don't feel too guilty at all for a change.

I didn't drink, I maintained a stoic distance from the baked camembert and French stick that was the stand-up starter which meant that I only had two pieces of bread instead of many, and I didn't have seconds of the main which was gumbo with rice and salad (delicious - must look into how you make that!).  I do confess to having a small second helping of the dessert which was Mississippi Mud Pie, but don't feel too shameful about that since the first helping wasn't big, and the second was smaller.  Wooooot!  Go me!

On the downside, I did miss my spin class yesterday and today.  I'm trying to get hold of a dress I want for the wedding this weekend, and one of work colleagues is able to get me a 25% discount in John Lewis on it, which is significant given the price of the dress.  I thought we were going to get it yesterday lunchtime, but that turned into today - can't really complain as she's doing me a massive favour, but means I need to do a bit of a re-jig of my exercise schedule this week, if I want to fit all my sessions in.  Unfortunately, we went to the store this lunchtime to collect it, and my colleague was told that her discount card wasn't valid because it was in her son's name not hers, so she's going back after work with her son as she refuses to be defeated!  Bless her!  Although it currently leaves me with no spin class and no dress either - doh!

Tonight's drinks / dinner have just been cancelled so I now have an evening off to relax and catch up on my Cinderella duties at home, which I'm oddly relieved about as it means I don't have to worry about squeezing another dinner out and alcohol into this week's plan!  Always time for that next week!

Monday 16 April 2012

Weekend Win

Without wanting to feel too smug, I have to admit to feeling a little proud of myself for my behaviour over the weekend.  Weekend's have always been a danger zone for me, and the last couple of  months they've been truly abysmal.  I usually trash my progress over the weekend and then spend the rest of the week scrabbling desperately to catch up with myself.  No wonder then, that my progress on the scales has been stalled or creeping up recently.

But for the first time in a good long while, I feel like I maintained a bit of discipline this weekend and made some better and conscientious choises.  Sure, I used up quite a few of my weekly allowance on Friday night, but then I did at least stop to think about things a bit more on Saturday and Sunday.  And the evidence is in the scales - up just 1lb from Friday's weigh in, instead of the usual 3 or 4lbs I've been seeing recently.

I enjoy feeling like I've done well with my eating and exercise - who doesn't? - but now I need to maintain my concentration, instead of doing what has happened all too often recently and veering of course again.  It'll be an interesting week for me to stay focused on, as we've got dinner with friends tomorrow, that I suspect will be more mini-dinner party than casual, and I'm meeting a friend of drinks / dinner on Wednesday night, and then Friday I'm off back up home for a wedding.

The aims for the week are therefore as follows: 
  • eat sensibly during the days in the office.
  • don't have seconds tomorrow night (since I can't control what I eat, but can control how much).
  • drive tomorrow night so I can stay off the booze.
  • keep up last week's exercise schedule - 1 Body Balance, 1 spin, 1 run, 1 circuits class.

Let's keep this 'ere wagon rolling!

Friday 13 April 2012

Ooookaaaaay

Somehow, in the midst of work craziness, I seem to have pulled a little sanity from the mess.

I've managed to get 2 good days of eating in now, with today looking like number 3. And I managed to go back to spin on Tuesday, and a short speed session run yesterday and I'm forcing myself to go to circuits today. Right now in fact.

Because I remind myself that I feel better when I exercise, and my sheer exhaustion and lethargy at the moment from a full-on weekend followed by a tough week at work will not be helped by dodging the gym and feeling guilty about it.

Scales put me back at 12st 1.8lb (ish - they were being a little crazy) and I can work with that.

Time to take my weary legs to the gym now. Xx


- Posted from my iPhone

Wednesday 11 April 2012

Sabotage

I need to figure out what is going on with my eating habits at the moment, as I can't understand why I keep sabotaging myself like this.

I had a good day today - even making it through my 4.5 hours of overtime unscathed by thinking ahead and going and getting a sandwich from Tescos as soon as it looked like I'd be staying late. Hell, I even made it to spin at lunchtime for the first time in 4 months, which felt great!!

So please explain to me, why when I got home from work at just after 10pm, I then devoured 2 slices of bread with potted crab, and an entire Easter egg. Why? I'm not, and wasn't, particularly hungry. Yet I've single-handedly written off today's efforts.

What a pointless, pointless waste.

I'm sick of doing this to myself - I seem to be locked in an upward spiral on the scales at the moment, and it certainly doesn't make me feel any better.

I have really got to get a grip. Try and focus on how I feel when it's right rather than the self-recriminations when it's not.

I certainly cannot keep going like this unless I'm prepared to see a major back-track happen.

I have to find some control and balance.

- Posted from my iPhone

Sabotage

I need to figure out what is going on with my eating habits at the moment, as I can't understand why I keep sabotaging myself like this.

I had a good day today - even making it through my 4.5 hours of overtime unscathed by thinking ahead and going and getting a sandwich from Tescos as soon as it looked like I'd be staying late. Hell, I even made it to spin at lunchtime for the first time in 4 months, which felt great!!

So please explain to me, why when I got home from work at just after 10pm, I then devoured 2 slices of bread with potted crab, and an entire Easter egg. Why? I'm not, and wasn't, particularly hungry. Yet I've single-handedly written off today's efforts.

What a pointless, pointless waste.

I'm sick of doing this to myself - I seem to be locked in an upward spiral on the scales at the moment, and it certainly doesn't make me feel any better.

I have really got to get a grip. Try and focus on how I feel when it's right rather than the self-recriminations when it's not.

I certainly cannot keep going like this unless I'm prepared to see a major back-track happen.

I have to find some control and balance.

- Posted from my iPhone

Thursday 5 April 2012

Fair To Middling

That's pretty much how I'd describe this last week - fair to middling. I don't feel like I've eaten the best, and I know there are places where I could have denied myself to stick rigidly to the plan, but at the same time I've tracked honestly, eaten thoughtfully, and I've definitely seen worse weeks on my tracker.

There's been a bit too much chocolate this week, courtesy of the run-up to Easter and since I'm in a hormonally-weakened state I caved to that pressure. There's also been less exercise than I'd like as I seem to be in a bit of a lazy, lethargic slump this week, but I'm hoping that this weekend will help jerk me out of that.

I'm not sure what the scales will bring tomorrow due to said hormonal-ness, but this weekend certainly brings lots of fresh air and potential exercise, as I'm off camping and surfing in Cornwall.

Of course, this also brings the potential for dietary misbehaviour, but I'm looking on the positive side. We're camping, and since it's a super big group of us (40 folks from the surf club) we're all keeping our catering separate, so I'm in control of what I take for most breakfasts and dinners. There is one meal out planned for tomorrow night at a local pub, but I can cope with that. The plan is to surf, if the conditions play ball, so that's 3 potential surfs, and if they don't to walk or hire bikes and cycle. There shouldn't be any shortage of walking.

The danger point will be booze, as I suspect 40 people have the capacity to drink a lot, but here again, I'm in control of what I take and choose to drink and how much. It's also going to be blinkin' cold so maybe I'll burn a few extra calories from that!!

Hoping for a fun, outdoorsy weekend to blow the cobwebs out!!

Happy Easter folks!!


- Posted from my iPhone

Tuesday 3 April 2012

We Will Not Quit

Good Thing: I actually made a bit of an effort over the weekend, and although I enjoyed a few nice things, I didn't think I did to badly. I tracked it all and remained accountable.

Bad Thing: the scales did not register that effort. in fact, they very unhappily said 12st 5lb on Monday morning. Another new high. However, that might not all be due to the weekend: on Sunday morning I noticed that there was a load of fluff stuck to one of the footpads of the scales, which I peeled off (ick!), so I'm wondering I've been having false readings for a while since the scales wouldn't have sat flat on the floor.

Good Thing: I'm not going to let that put me off.

I sat and pondered yesterday what my weaknesses are with regard to my weight - my bad habits and the corners I cut. Then I wrote down clear strategies to deal with them. I wrote 3 A4 sides of notes to myself.

I've been eating out too much. Drinking too much. I've got no food in the house and I haven't planned my food so I snack on the wrong things. Sometimes I get it right, but overall, it's no wonder I've found it hard.

I put it into practice yesterday - I was out last night (on a date! It went well thanks!) and I behaved much better. Sticking to spirits, alternating my non-alcoholic drinks. Eating more moderately.

I will not give up. I won't be put off or distracted by the scales. I will keep trying to get this right. I still want to reach my goals.

I will. Not. Quit.


- Posted from my iPhone