I cried. A lot.
I talked without direction, just letting the flow of my own thoughts lead me where it would. Sometimes there was a silence, sometimes I couldn't talk for snot and tears.
The hour passed quickly, once I got started and I got over my initial embarrassment. We talked (I talked?) about a lot of stuff - things I knew were upsetting me, and others that I hadn't even thought of in a while.
At the end of the hour, my counseller said that she had a few ideas of where she wanted to take the next session, and we're meeting again next week.
On the way home, I did something. I went to the cemetary and visited my mum's grave. I haven't been there since the day we interred the ashes. I realised as I stood there, that I've never seen her headstone, until today. It was a bittersweet moment, and I guess I told her I missed her.
I have a socking great headache now (always a post-crying thing for me), and I have to pack for the weekend. I think I'll do what I need to and then sod off to bed and switch off completely.
6 comments:
I have been in therapy for years, and I love every second of it. I hope the experience continues to being amazing/life changing/challenging- most of all a safe place to land.
Hi there. Am fairly new to blogging but have loved catching up with all your posts.
Just wanted to say - the counselling thing is really difficult and you will probably end up crying a LOT more but it is one of the most positive things you can do for yourself. I saw a counsellor for about six months a couple of years ago and it really sorted a lot of stuff out.
Have a fab weekend away and I look forward to reading more about your adventures! (especially your trip later this year - v jealous ;-) )
Sx
Sympathy and support - from me to you.
Really glad it enabled you to visit your mum's grave - that's progress already
Have a good weekend.
love
Peridot
Thanks for sharing such a personal experience - it's very brave of you. Hope it continues to open up all sorts of avenues for you - doubtless some of them might be a bit 'scary' but I'm sure overall the whole journey will help you immensely. Zxx
I think crying is a good thing, it helps you release a lot of stuff. You've already made progress so that's brilliant.
Have a good weekend x
Well Done. I think when I tried Counselling it didn't work as I just couldn't talk. I find it hard to say how I'm feeling to my partner so its not a suprise. I am trying to get better at it though.
Hope it works for you in the long run, sounds like the first session was a success!
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