Hanging in there

Well, I've survived the night. Mostly because I did what you're not supposed to do and knocked myself out with an extra dose of Diazepam and painkillers. I know, I know - not big and not clever, but I was full on desperate by then.

Yesterday sucked on so many levels. Firstly, because it was damn near impossible to get into any position that didn't hurt somehow. I spent most of yesterday lying curled tight in a foetal position to take the strain off my hip, but it wasn't until last night that I figured that if I banked all my cushions to raise my upper body that it gave extra relief to my hip.

Of course the problem with not being able to stretch out is your muscles get all achey everywhere else - all I longed to do was straighten my back and stretch my legs, but no can do.

Then there was the episode where my entire left leg (the bursitis is on my left hip) went into to total lock-down spasm for 20 mins. I think that may have been the single most painful thing I have ever experienced - and in my accident prone life I have broken multiple bones, concussed myself and ripped numerous ligaments, as well as winding myself so bad I thought my lungs had stopped working. They had nothing on this. I'm not ashamed to admit that I lay there and cried hysterically for pretty much the whole thing. It's frightening when you literally can't move, because everything makes it feel worse - even gasping in breath. It was like every single muscle in my leg, up to and including my hip and down got simultaneous bad cramp. All of them. Calf, thigh, quads, all the little muscles in my ankle and foot. JESUS! And rubbing them doesn't help. Anyhoo - it passed eventually, but I think I lay there for another hour or so before I dared to try moving again.

I woke a few times in the night a bit uncomfortable from the immobility, but I think that last lot of extra tablets before bed made the difference, as I slowly found myself able to stretch out a bit, move to my back, and even over on to my bad side for a little bit this morning. I finally slept in till 11am which is good.

I'm a little bit more mobile today. Walking's still difficult, but I'm a little bit more upright, and sitting and lying are better. I'm not going to venture out today though - just going to take it easy as. Going to have to ask my neighbour if he could be a star and take my kitchen bin out for me though - I haven't been able to do any cleaning in the kitchen since Tuesday when this all started - it's been as much as I could do to go in, get easy food and hobble out again, but it's a disaster area in there now. I reckon if he can take the bin out, I can make a vague attempt at starting to clear some of the washing up a bit at a time.

Ironically, I ended up exactly bang on for points yesterday, without counting it up, just because I was grabbing what was easy and quick from the kitchen. The scales have gone back down again though this morning. Weird.

So that's me - thanks for the nice messages the last couple of days - internet's been virtually my only contact with people, so it's nice to read them. I was supposed to be seeing friends this evening, but I don't know if I feel up to it yet. They were just going to come round and bring take-away, so I'll see how I'm doing by then.